An Exclusive Interview with Dr. Aruna kalra- Senior gynaecologist and Robotic Surgeon at CK Birla Hospital gurugram on her book “I Want a Boy
In this revealing interview, Dr. Aruna Kalra, Senior Gynaecologist and Robotic Surgeon at CK Birla Hospital, discusses her book “I Want a Boy.”
Drawing from over 25 years in clinical practice, she explores India’s entrenched gender bias and son preference through firsthand patient stories, challenging the deep-rooted cultural mindset that continues to shape reproductive choices.
What inspired you to pursue a career in medicine, specifically in gynecology?
Dr. Aruna Kalra: From a very young age, I was fascinated by the miracle of birth. Medicine felt like a calling, not a career. Gynecology, in particular, allowed me to be part of some of the most intimate and powerful moments in a woman’s life—from pregnancy and childbirth to surgeries that transform quality of life.
I chose this path to serve women, empower them with information, and make healthcare experiences more respectful and humane.
“I Want a Boy” is a bold title that directly addresses a deeply ingrained societal issue. What inspired you to write this book, and how much of it comes from your real-life experiences as a gynecologist in India?
Dr. Aruna Kalra: The title reflects a phrase I’ve heard far too often in my practice. The book is born entirely out of real experiences—cases where women were blamed, abandoned, or broken simply because they bore daughters.
It was no longer enough to treat patients medically; I felt compelled to confront this mindset socially and emotionally. Writing the book was a cathartic, urgent response to what I witness daily in my clinic.
In your book, you explore the emotional and psychological impact of gender bias. What message do you hope young parents, especially mothers, take away from reading it?
Dr. Aruna Kalra: I want mothers to reclaim their self-worth and realize that bearing a daughter is not a failure—it is a blessing. I hope young parents see how deeply these biases are internalized and choose to raise their children differently, with equity and dignity.
The message is simple: a child is a child. The burden of societal expectations shouldn’t rest on a mother’s shoulders.
Can you share your journey into robotic surgery and what excites you about this technology?
Dr. Aruna Kalra: My journey into robotic surgery was driven by a passion for precision and minimally invasive care.
Robotics allows me to perform complex procedures with better vision, dexterity, and safety—especially in cases like endometriosis or fibroids. What excites me most is the potential to reduce patient recovery time while improving surgical outcomes. It represents the future of gynecology.
How do you approach patient care and ensure a comfortable experience for your patients?
Dr. Aruna Kalra: For me, empathy is the foundation of patient care. I make it a point to listen—really listen—to my patients. I explain procedures, respect privacy, and ensure they feel seen and heard.
Whether it’s a teenager with PCOS or a woman in labor, I want every patient to feel safe, supported, and empowered in their health journey.
Can you discuss a particularly challenging case you’ve encountered in your practice and how you handled it?
Dr. Aruna Kalra: There was a young woman with severe bowel endometriosis who had been misdiagnosed for years and had lost all hope. Robotic surgery allowed us to excise the disease completely while preserving her organs and future fertility.
The case was surgically demanding, but emotionally even more so—because she was at the edge of despair. Seeing her pain-free and planning a pregnancy was deeply fulfilling.
How do you balance your professional responsibilities with personal life, and what strategies do you use to manage stress?
Dr. Aruna Kalra: Balance is a daily practice. I rely on my mother’s support, who helps care for my children, and I intentionally create boundaries to protect family time. Dance, exercise, reading, and time in nature keep me grounded.
I also believe in delegation, trusting my team, and not being afraid to ask for help. Most importantly, I check in with myself—mentally and emotionally.
As a practicing doctor and author, how do you balance being a healthcare provider with being a strong voice for social change? Have you seen any shift in mindset among your patients over the years regarding gender preference?
Dr. Aruna Kalra: Being a gynecologist puts me in a unique position to witness societal pain points—especially those affecting women. I see advocacy as a responsibility, not a side project.
Through writing, speaking, and patient education, I challenge outdated norms. Yes, mindsets are slowly shifting—urban families are becoming more accepting—but the pressure to bear sons still lingers, especially in extended families. We must keep the conversation alive.
What advice would you give to young women considering a career in medicine, particularly in specialties like gynecology?
Dr. Aruna Kalra: Stay passionate and don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t do it. Gynecology is emotionally demanding but incredibly rewarding. Learn to draw strength from your patients’ resilience.
Build support systems, take care of your own mental health, and never stop learning. Your empathy, combined with skill, can truly change lives.
“I Want a Boy” stands as both an urgent call for awareness and a compassionate plea for societal reform.
Dr. Kalra’s powerful insights urge us to confront how we value life and womanhood, highlighting the need for reflection and change to end the cycle of gender discrimination in contemporary India.
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